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Sunday
Jul012012

Scientology Cruise Ship Sunk! Welcome Back KT!

FINALLY! Someone has addressed the gigantic scientologist gorilla in the room and there was apparently a lot of strategy involved too! Before actress Katie Holmes filed for divorce, she already had set out an escape plan.

According to sources, she rented out an apartment for her and Suri in New York City that is separate from the home that she shares with Cruise in New York on West 12th street. While Cruise was 2,600 miles away in Iceland filming sci-fi flick “Oblivion”, this natural beauty quietly filed for divorce under “Anonymous vs. Anonymous” in New York on Thursday and is seeking sole custody of their 6-year-old daughter, Suri.

The reason for divorce is reportedly to do with Cruise’s fierce loyalty to Scientology.

Signs of trouble were always swept under the rug during TomKat’s relationship. Stories of Katie’s hands turning purple during a Scientology purity treatment, buying a home ultra sound machine for Suri during Katie’s pregnancy, silent births, and Tom “joking” about eating the placenta after Suri’s birth, were just among the few oddities that were public news.

And now for the settlement: Cruise and Holmes were ranked as the 9th most powerful celebrity couple, having brought in $75 million last year, according to Forbes magazine. Before they even said, “I do” they had already signed an extensive pre-nup that outlines her getting $3 million for each year of their union. However, the deal had a cap at $33 million. Regardless, Katie is still walking away with a cool $15 million based on current details.

In the end, here at the Mug we are grateful that Katie has snapped back to reality and decided to save Suri from this kooky three-time loser. We can all go back to our Dawson’s Creek fantasy about her crawling into our bedroom windows now.

As for you, Katie? Go back to wearing high heels! You no longer have to settle under 5’7”. And here come the Mug Shots .. 

 

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